Taming the Beast

The Beast comes back time and again

I’ve got nothing left to say

I’ve bid Her, oh-so-bitterly,

An “I-swear-I-said

Good Day.”

And I should know by now

By now

By now

I have travelled far enough Down

This road of heathen roads

To simply Know, to simply Know

To simply know

By now…

Shutting Her down with a Go Away

Don’t do nothin’ to ease Her pain

But something in me keeps Hoping

Keeps expecting things to change

Like, perhaps the Tiger in the cage

Just…won’t show up today

And I am lucky

I guess

That there’ve been days

When I locked The Beast inside

Unlucky

I guess

The cage that’s locked

Resides within my mind

The paradox:

I seek control while wishing things would change

I have come to understand:

Life just don’t work that way

So I have learned to tolerate insufferable suffering

By doing The Thing that’s The Hardest Thing:

Not letting go of me

And the difference is the Hanging On…

It Changes Everything

‘Cause the suffering has meaning, I have built my strength

The Beast returns, gets out Her cage,

Wild with Her insatiable Rage

But it is I who holds the whip

And She is Mine to tame

So when she roars and bares her gleaming, razor-fangs

I do not run from Her, afraid

I meet her gaze, think ‘bring it on,’

A grin begins to play

I give a tiny nod, instead —

A challenge to The Beast I’ve tamed

Offer Her, respectfully:

An welcoming

“Good Day.”

 

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Ying/Yang

Sometimes

God calls

In Her silent ways

Tugging at the soul like Intuition

Which only becomes nagging…

When we Refuse to Listen

She shows up gently at first –

A little itch at the neck

Or a whisper in the back of the head

Or a sense that something is Not Quite Right

Sometimes

God begs

From Her Presence on High

Or maybe from Deep Below

Where the gut speaks

In gurgles and bubbles and indigestion

Please, She says plainly now,

I am trying to get your Attention

But we have gotten so used to pushing Her aside

Placing Her in a box of the Archaic kind —

Urging in voices that are not ours but our Parents

Or our Parent’s parents:

“You must fit in This.”

(Bullshit.)

We’ve been believing this and Restricting Her

Or hiding Her,

Sweeping Her under the rug

Until

Sometimes

God screams

She badgers us and weighs heavy on our souls

Now we have enraged Her

She tried so hard in Her gentle kind of way

But we would have none of that, No.

We westerners so used to listening and valuing only One Side:

The goal-oriented, straight-line, get-shit-done-yesterday-damn-it!

Patriarchal approach

(When the round-a-bout, Matriarchal way is proven to lead to better learning)

Did you know this?

Doubtful, because She has been dismissed – missed —

By way of men’s unintentional ignorance

How could any God not be Whole?

Look to Nature and see your Soul!

I swear — You will find it includes Both.

The Feminine half of the Godhead, though

Has suffered

And suffered

For so long

That we humans begin to rot right along with Her

Suppressing the feelings that might help to lift Her up

To be renewed from Life’s overflowing cup

But We do not hear Her until she screams

And then we call her a Bitch or a Nag

Or some other Unpleasant Female Name

Or we ignore Her, still!

Sometimes,

God calls

Why wait for Her to start screaming?

Why not just close your eyes, center in

And Listen?

Fragile

Fragile girl

You hold the world

In the brightness of your eyes

The blue in them reaches me

I have cried the way you’ve cried

Fragile girl

I see you, so!

I see your light inside

So many gifts within your soul

I’d be ruined if you died

Fragile girl

My heart pleads

Keep fighting this blackest night

The journey will get easier

If you don’t give up the fight

Fragile girl, I won’t lie and say

I know what the future holds

But I beg you to stay with it all

Let your life unfold

Living’s so much harder than I ever thought it’d be

No one told us life would include so much suffering

Oh fragile girl

You’re not just fragile, girl

Inside – the strength of stone!

I see this clearly because one can only understand

What one also

Knows

No More Easy

There is no more Easy

I have gone way, way…

Way too far in

I have Seen Things most won’t ever See

I have taken flight on hellish wings

Clasped hands with dead visionaries

While friends from this 2013

Somehow don’t seem as real to me

Life will never again be “Fun”

In the way the Unencumbered use the term

Fun like carefree

Fun like light

No, The Work comes with it a weighted plight

The kind that can’t just breeze by anymore

The kind that’s tethered to Something More

A bigger fate, behind the scenes

We carry the cross

For Others’ dreams

And know, as we tread the weathered road

There is no more

Easy.