I find my own Heart



Beating in warrior rhythms

Slow and steady

Waiting for me to return to it

And I have

The reunion

Is a true


I am solidified

In this liquefied ever-changing Whole

Humbled and Empowered

At the same time.

I no longer question.

Simply, I just


This Is God

I am in The Chrysalis

I sit in meditation

How do I begin to tell you what it feels like

To be in the womb of the Great Mother?

How do I begin to describe this warm, pulsating energy

I am dropping down into

As I am lifted up at the same time?

I have never been more sober

Nor felt more high.

I am in a soft Orange-Red place.

I feel myself release into Trusting.

And then I

E X P A N D, oscillating out into Everything

And there is no more “I.”

How do I tell you I have actually

Experienced being One with the whole


That “being one” is not an idea

But a sacred Act of Allowing

Allowing yourself to Feel so completely

That you lose yourself.

Only…it is not scary at all.

Not like I imagined.

My sweet ego thought about the end of my life and pleaded,

“But, there’s no one like me! I don’t want to die! I like who I am.”

Now I Know

Beyond a shadow of a doubt

Death is nothing to fear.



White light vibrating energy moving through me

In waves and spades

As sunshine parades through my soul

It may be

That I may be whole.

I followed It last night

I didn’t fight

I drew instead so It revealed

Who It was, in symbols

My respect, my surrender

My willingness to give in!

And say, “I don’t know …

But show me.”

And, oh, It showed me in those symbols

As cymbals played in my head

And every other kind of instrument;

In Aliveness gyrating in my skin

Could not even consider sleep

Nor did I need a place to rest my head

“Awake! Awake! Awake!” It said,

“It’s time to Live and grow in ways

You can’t imagine


I come to tell you that you have reached the place —

The very one —

That reaches still another one.”

And I felt no regret at this!

But only gentle tenderness

Feathers whisking up my skin

As if to say “Alive again!”

The night before, something died.

Now something New




They all talk about that historic plane

That flew through the eye of the hurricane;

The brave pilot who faced that massive twister

Air and debris spinning like the Inception top

Crazily —

Teetering —

On the brink of sanity;

Or, perhaps…

Gone right on past?

It’s hard to tell at The Edge like that.

Either way, I have to say —

I ain’t no eye of the hurricane.

I am, instead, the air and debris –

The stuff that makes up that Wild Thing.


(Perhaps too occupied with”winning?”)

The ego fights so I go on spinning…

Round and round and round I go…

So close to the center

(So very far though!)

And I long to be the historic plane;

The brave pilot who pierced the peaceful center;

For I have long known the dangerous Exit

But tell me, pray, tell me:

Where do I enter?

The Choice

Drunk on love feelings, oxytocin, and wine

They stumble, giddy, out into the dark night street

An “oops” wine stain on a white shirt followed by a giggle

As he offers “let me get that for you”

And his hand brushes her breast

A blush lighter than the wine spreads across her cheeks

Soul-gazing stares and “no one gets me like you do” thoughts

And the mutually used — over-used word — said to friends

“It’s like…we have this connection..

The long make-out sessions where “we can’t have sex yet” she whispers

“Trust issues”

He’s okay with it

A gentleman can handle the Blue Frustration

And she sees this

So then, one day, they do.

About 3 months in – maybe 6 (if they’re lucky)

The buzz wears off and he starts to think “she seems pretty needy, emotional, complex…”

And she starts to think “he is closed-off, overly practical and frankly, kind of boring…”

They each long for that Original Night that seemed to last forever

Where everything just clicked,

Fell away…

And they saw only the Good Soul Essence

But it is a different night.

No more fantasy

No more drunken romantic-movie-like illusions about Princes or Goddesses.

They stand facing one another

Truly naked for the first time

Each one must decide

If they want to love a human being

Or an ideal

If they want the thing they say they want:

Actual True Love.