Surrender

surrender

Oh sweet surrender!

I lie in the arms of my beloved

And breathe a sigh of relief

It is not up to me

It is not up to me

How tightly I held on!

And for so long

Grasping at straws

Greedy for answers

On my timeline

My ego screeched —

Begging, suffering, fighting

Struggling, striving

Needlessly

Needlessly!

Like fighting the wind

Or the stars

Demanding control of that which cannot be!

To think I actually wanted answers when I wanted them

How boring

How stale

How unimaginative

The juice of life lives in the Unknown

I was an ant believing I was an elephant

Now I am an ant and know I am an ant

Oh sweet, sweet surrender

I grasp nothing

Nor is there any need…

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The Broken Thing

obiwan

He hides in books and bitterness

Protests against loving attempts

With an ever-present, I’m not ready for This

His hurt is the hand he uses to push Them away

Meanwhile, inside

He craves and craves

A meaningful Love he shoves swiftly away

Has empty encounters that offer brief pleasures

But those kind of pleasures just evaporate

Afterward, so painfully aware

Of exactly What and How Much is not there

He can’t bear demands or needs or wants

Lays it all on the table at once

This won’t be what you want it to be

Don’t think you’re special

Don’t fall for me

Reverse psychology, They think

Except – um, Oops – he says what He means

That’s the Broken Man speaking

He told me the very same thing

The difference is I listen

I know that road is his to go

Maybe he’ll defeat The Thing inside who speaks

On the other hand

Maybe he’ll just listen…

 

An Invitation

broken_wings_by_mendha-d4i4am8

Come to me with your broken pieces

I have a special kind of glue

I can only use it on one person

I have chosen you

Come to me with your broken wings

I’ve got an extra pair

Been saving them since 17

‘Case you ever came back here

Come to me with your bitter rage

There’s an elixir that I’ve mixed

Made from truth and bond and love

Free of traps and tricks

Come to me, if you will

I won’t ever force your hand

It’s merely an invitation, love

Never a command

I wait for you to realize what I have always known

I loved you then and now and always

Been forever yours, alone

I hang here in the balance

In the darkness of lost years

My palm is open, wondering

If you’ll master all your fears…

 

 

A Soul I Know

firstlove

Why bring things back around like this

It happens rarely

Scarcely

A billion different ways life goes

And you came back to me

My heart so full, no room for speech

In fact, I think I cried for you

Sitting there across from me

A soul I know

A soul I don’t

Simultaneously

I see your eyes reach for me while

Your hands keep me away

Could it be this serendipity’s

Just a torturous trick of fate?

They say love is all around us

But what good would that be

If you cannot untrap your soul

Let it reside with me?

I simply go on living

For what else is there to do

Store away my Depth of Feeling

It lived for only you

What Cruel Thing would bring us back together

But never let us manifest?

I won’t let myself believe it yet

Would be too much to bear

Would snatch the last shred of hope I have

And throw it in the fire